Author: commtims

     The City of Fort Lauderdale might just buy you a one-way bus ticket out of town!



     Of course, that’s if you are one of our many homeless that get stuck here with little hope and even less resources.

     Many find themselves hanging around Stranahan Park looking for a meal, aggressively panhandling, unnerving the tourists, heading downhill fast!

     The program is called the Homeward Bound Reunification program ( named after the Paul Simon song, I’m guessing).

     The Fort Lauderdale City Commission adopted the program a few months ago, and it started this month. So far, 10 people have taken the City up on the tickets.


          Greyhound bound for destinations north!

     The free rides cost the City as little as $40 each, and as much as $200 each. Greyhound took the people to St. Pete, Northport, and Leesburg in Florida. And the rest went to Alabama, Georgia, Ohio, Massachusetts, and North Carolina.

     The youngest person was 35, and the oldest 58. The notes on the chart say we sent them home with “2 sandwiches and gatorade”, or “food from Mount Olive”, and one guy just got “water!”

     The reasons for them needing the busing services included “out of prison – no work”, “extradited back for warrant”,  and “son putting mom in trailer!”  …huh?.

     I called most of the people listed as being the responsible parties on the receiving side of the bus trip ( the parents/brother etc.) . They all said their people made it home, and they were all very appreciative to Fort Lauderdale.

     Now, if we can just get some tickets ready for this group below –

                         
                                Occupy Fort Lauderdalers still living at City Hall !

     The primary election for the Fort Lauderdale City Commission is just a week away, and last night there was a big debate at City Hall.

        

     All the candidates showed up except for the fake candidate, Crimi ( though he did have a name tag on the dias!)

     Only the Mayor’s race and the District II race has a primary next week, as there has to be three candidates to have a primary. District I and District IV only have two candidates, and their races take place on March 13th. District III incumbent Bobby Dubose got reelected without opposition.

    Last night’s debate was pretty boring. The format asked all nine candidates to answer the same questions, and the crowd began to bail out about halfway into the debate. The Council of Neighborhoods should change that next time around.

     It’s not what the candidates said that was interesting, but what their facial expressions said!

                   
                                 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ..




                       
                               please don’t stop me…I wanna go home!  




             
                      …..   sheesh, Rynerson and his damn lying chart again!




                                  
                                        OK, I’ll pose, get it over with …



                 
              Boy I’m glad I took that shot of Jagermeister before this thing!




                         
                           ha ! …I’m Judy Stern and I’m the puppet master !!




                  
           … yea, sure you are the Puppet master Judy, sure you are …………




                    
                     “hmm… wonder what I should put in my next commercial?”


                       Note:  ( Art Seitz took the picture of Rodstrom) …….. 
 

      I’d like to outlaw campaign signs!

     They bring out the worst in some campaigns, and their supporters, and often lay around junking up the scenery for months after every election!

     Here’s the latest foul play …….

                      ……………………………………………………..

     Kevin Buckley is one of our premier shopping center developers.

                                       
                                            cool kat Kevin!

     He is a mellow guy, been around a long time, but today he’s mad as a hornet.

     This is his unwanted campaign sign story –

     …..” So Tim,  I drove past one of my shopping centers, Barnes and Nobles, and out front was this big…..
                                   
                                     Rynerson for Mayor sign


       …… Now, I didn’t give this Rynerson character permission to put this sign up, he never called or wrote to ask!….   and to make matters worse, I had gotten 3 Robo campaign phone calls from his campaign over the last three nights – at dinner time!

     …..  Anyhow, I decided to call his campaign and ask him to come and take the sign down, give him a chance to do the right thing… but after 3 calls and no return calls, my blood began to boil….

       …… I grabbed my wife and we went right over and took the sign down ourselves !…..  and now, I’m filing a complaint with the State Elections Board….

      …… And  …… just to make sure this Rynerson feels the pain, I added this”

                       
                   

    Commissioner candidate Zalewski slashed ! Politics as usual !


                                

     Since we’ve been talking about crime a lot lately, I thought I’d try and find some perspective.


    
       First, the good news – In 1994, believe it or not, little ole Fort Lauderdale was the most crime ridden city in America (per capita) ….. this past year, we’re way down  to #77, –  serious progress.

 
                              

   But here’s the rest of the story!

     Some of our neighborhoods are very safe.
 
     Sunrise Key ( where taxi magnate Jesse Gaddis lives) had NO CRIME last year. Neither did Bay Colony (up off North US 1, behind the TGIF restaurant.)

     Bal Harbor had only 1 crime ( smart move by new City Manager Lee Feldman moving there!). Riviera Isles ( off Las Olas) also had only 1 crime. Sunrise Intracoastal, behind the Galleria Mall – 1 crime. 

     Rounding out the safe places are Birch Finger Streets ( north of Sunrise Blvd., across from the beach) with 3 crimes, Nurmi Isle (Rodstrom’s neighborhood) with 5 crimes, Idylwyld with 5, and Harbor Beach with 9 crimes.

                    ………………………………………………………….

     But then, some neighborhoods are on fire!

                                           

     Progresso Village ( where they almost put the Homeless Feeding Camp), had 191 crimes , Flagler Heights ( north downtown) had 178 crimes, Victoria Park – 213 crimes, Melrose Park – 250 , Dorsey Riverbend – 267, Lauderdale Manors – 377, 

                  ……………  and the winner ( or loser, depends how you look at it)
 

      

     South Middle River – 473 crimes ( 240 of them home burglaries)….   SMR did have some help winning the most crime ridden award with this –


   
                 
                                 The Crescent House
 
 – a group home for troubled male youths. During this past year, 58 of it’s residents were arrested, and one youth has 9 pending felonies! 

     I’m curious what you think about all this ….please add a comment …  

                                thanks, ….Tim 

       Turn up your volume –  see what it’s like to live in South Middle River tonight!     



                             

     Randall ( a.k.a Bear) Klett is mighty pissed.

     Randall is the President of the Middle River Terrace neighborhood in Fort Lauderdale ( I actually founded the neighborhood group back in 1993).

     Randall is also the owner of one of the largest leather gear providers nationally. His business is called LeatherWerks, and let’s just say the Village People probably shop there!

                                       
                                        Bear ( in uniform)

     Anyhow, here is the story of why Randall is so mightily pissed:

     Randall and his partner eat at the California Pizza Kitchen a few nights ago. They arrive back home, after ten, and realize that his partner had left his cell phone at the restaurant.

     The partner rushes back to the restaurant, gets the phone and heads back home.

     He’s nearly home ( they live behind the Leatherwerks store on NE 4th Ave., a few blocks north of Home Depot), when multiple Police Cars fall in line behind the partner.

     The partner is new to the area, nervous, and calls Randall to tell him he is being pulled over. The partner is pulling in to the Leatherwerk store’s parking lot at the time.

     Randall jumps out of the shower and pulls a towel around him, throws on his flip flops and darts out his back door. He tells the Police that his partner belongs there, that this is his business, and his house, that all is good.

     The Police tell him to go away or he will be arrested.

     Randall says that this is his property, that he’s not leaving!

     Next thing you know – Randall’s wearing the metal bracelets!  

    


     But what happens next is the real clincher – Randall’s towel falls off, and he is left threadless in his own business parking lot ( and, it’s a tad chilly!)

     Turns out, the Police thought Randall’s partner was looking for drugs. They called the K-9 Squad out, and there was no indication of drugs. 

     But, according to Randall, the Police weren’t quite finished – they write his partner a ticket for ” obstructed tag” on his 2010 Mercedes.

   
               the tag – picture taken by Randall the next day

     The Police release Randall, and leave. Randall says he understands DWB (driving while black) better now, as his partner was a victim of DWW ( in an historically known area where whites drive in looking for drugs)

     Randall sent a sharply worded e-mail the next day to the Police Chief, the  Mayor, the Manager and others. 

     He wants apologies. He wants the ticket quashed. 

                          I’ll keep you informed.



     

     
     
     
   

     It was the first, (and only) debate scheduled soley for the District II Fort Lauderdale Commission candidates.

     And only two of the three candidates made it.

     Commissioner Charlotte Rodstrom didn’t make the fun.


     According to Progresso Village President Doug Sterner, Rodstrom called a few days before and said her husband (John) surprised her with a trip out of town, and she wouldn’t be making the debate.

     That left her two challengers – Lester Zalewski and Michael Ferber.

    
                                      Zalewski


               
                                                    Ferber ( with hands moving)

   
     Zalewski came mostly prepared. He told the audience about his background, said he was “pro-redevelopment ( the logical and reasonable kind he said), said the neighborhood was “entitled” to leave their homes feeling safe.

     But Ferber was the life of the party !!

     Ferber is an unapologetic, rabid, Libertarian. He started by saying that he knew their area well ( living in the next neighborhood over), had served on many City advisory Boards, but was probably not going to say many things the audience wanted to hear!

     He was right!

     He said he came without any “meaningless platitudes” .

     He said that “there was no Santa Claus”. He said he wasn’t running to “make government more responsive”, but to reduce the size, cut-back, have government “abandon many of the things it was currently doing”. 

     He continued – they’ll be calling me “Mike the Knife”. He said he would “eliminate the Economic Development Department”.  He said he wouldn’t govern by “lynch mob politics”. 

     He finished by saying he would ” go to Def Com III in efforts to reduce the size of the City Government.

     This is probably what most of the attendees liked best about Ferber’s attendance – 

                                    
                                                      Ferber leaving the building
      

     

      I know this sounds like a bad, B –  horror movie, but it’s actually non-fiction – mine!
    
      And I also know that it has absolutely nothing to do with Fort Lauderdale Politics, so I’ll be brief.

     Do you want to know when’s the worse possible time for one of those old, used up molars to go bad? 

                  ……… Christmas Day !

    

     I couldn’t find a dentist working, even the day after Christmas, and I was getting desperate. My brilliant wife had an idea as I poured over the internet listings, calling and calling, and getting nowhere – “call one with a Jewish name”. 

     Sure enough, Dr. Wiener would see me, but only if I could get there by noon. 

     It was a bad case, he explained, but he thought he could save the tooth. I wanted him to kill the tooth!

     Anyhow, to make a long, painful story short, he couldn’t save it after all, and today ( weeks later), I found myself staring up at the bright white light in the Extraction Specialist’s chair ( is it safe?)

        

     When the Doc left the room, I glanced up at the torture tools!

                 

     Then, the young, very capable, Egyptian born dentist flew into the room, and in a matter of minutes ( that seemed much longer), the deed was done –  Mr. Badtooth was no more!


                            
                                                        … the culprit       

     I just got home and the wife asked if there was any pain?    I handed her this!

                                                                       

      The Fort Lauderdale residents of NW 5th Court, just south of Sistrunk Boulevard,  are mad as hell, and if they have anything to say about it, they’re 

                              not going to take it anymore!

     They’ve had 10 burglaries, just on their block, in the last month. Some of the residents say they won’t leave their houses, practically sleeping with their valuables!

     Today, they assembled to protest the conditions, to speak as a group, and  have a fish fry !
 
     The fish fry was not the odd part of the protest, the unusual part of the protest was the invitation list. 

      Here’s who came!
    

     Lots of Cops!

     The idea was to bring together the residents and the Police, to join forces, so to speak.
     
    

     The Chief and the neighborhood leaders addressed the group.

     They prayed.
 
     They kumbaya’d!

     The City Manager attended the fry to show support
             (while also supporting the Marlins!)

              

     Let’s hope it all works.